Did you read family laws before your wedding? Did you review court opinions when you bought your cars, house, or business together? If not, why rely on divorce laws to determine how to dissolve your marriage or domestic partnership?
If your soon to be ex is angry, narcissistic or irrationally unreasonable, you may need to rely on divorce laws and turn to the legal system for relief. If your spouse or partner is smart and reasonable however, you might find understanding legal ease on any issue other than procedure is unnecessary.
It may surprise you to know, a vast majority of reasonable successful couples in San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Silicon Valley, including lawyers and multi-millionaires with complex legal issues and significant wealth don’t adhere to family law. Think Jeff Bezos, Amazon founder and allegedly wealthiest man on the planet, and his wife who appear to have disregarded Washington’s laws when they divided their assets and negotiated a divorce settlement agreement.
Hopefully it’ll inspire you to know, the most satisfying divorce judgments are almost always those couples negotiate themselves based on the truth and facts of lives instead of laws written abstractly by legislatures and judges.
So, if the best and brightest can disregard divorce laws, why not you?
To be clear, I’m not suggesting, and in fact ask you not to break laws, breach fiduciary duties, or defy civil procedure and rules of court. I propose you act with integrity and compassion, and work with your spouse or domestic partner to cooperatively decide how you’ll disentwine your lives and dissolve your legal relationship mindfully. If you both decide it feels right, and you want to rely on divorce laws as you strive to cultivate sustainable new lives, go for it.